It is a given that we will have conflict with the people in our life. There are unmet expectations, frayed nerves, and internal and external personal pressures that can create friction in our relationships. Unfortunately, we don't always healthily address this tension in a timely fashion. We work up a scenario or conversation in our head that causes you stress. We begin to imagine that this person thinks the worst about you & is working against you. Our anxiety level skyrockets as we magnify the problem by worrying about things that haven't even happened yet. When you find yourself drowning in this unresolved (and sometimes self-imposed) conflict you are left with two choices. You can choose to keep maintaining a destructive inner monologue or enter into reality and seek to resolve the problem without adding your preconceived notions to the fire.
Here are a few keys to doing this in healthy way:
- Pray carefully for God's wisdom & peace.
- Pray for the other person and the receptivity of their spirit.
- Enter into the conversation with no agenda but peaceful resolution--not victory.
- Listen intently without forming your reply as they speak, but be genuinely engaged in their perspective.
- Do your very best to be at peace with them & the situation regardless of their reaction.
A healthy, peaceful resolution has to start with us first. Understanding that our efforts are far more about our personal journey with God than anything else can fuel that momentum in a healthier direction.
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