Last Day

It's the last day of 2011 and in a somewhat cliche & typical manner I find myself looking back over the past 365 days (I actually have been for most of the month of December.) I don't believe that I could accurately reflect on all that this year delivered (and in some instances didn't deliver) in one blog. I will admit that it has been a tough and challenging year both spiritually and professionally. That isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it still has me sorting out the lessons that need to be carried over and implemented, and which ones can be set aside. There have been tremendous blessings for my family and God has certainly shown us favor and love in multiple ways. Our family has grown closer together this year and we have seen God's answer to prayers for our children and continue to seek Him for more. God is working in and through us to see His will made complete and even if I don't understand everything as it occurs I know that His plan will prevail.

I'm not finished ruminating on all that 2011 offered, but I also don't want to get trapped looking at the past when there are opportunities for growth in front of me that need to be grabbed onto. I look forward to seeing goals accomplished personally and professionally and know that success will be a blend of God's blessing & guidance and my faithful obedience and perseverance.

To paraphrase a popular sports writer: and this year will be better than the last.

Not Yet

I seem to have fallen off of the blogging wagon these last few days of 2011. I have had many thoughts of blogs to write, but have lacked the time and zeal to sit and write them out. In fact, I would even argue that I have fallen victim to dwelling in these thoughts a little too much in the busyness of the Christmas schedule.

The thought that I have been mulling over more than any other is a question that I read in a leadership blog last week: Will you be where you want to be in five years by doing what you are doing today? That requires forethought and an understanding of the choices that you make today building towards a future. It means having a vision of where you want to be and what kind of person you want to develop into. Achieving that vision requires discipline to stay committed to the plan that God has revealed to you even when the journey seems difficult.

My immediate answer when I first read that question was a resounding "No." But while I am not entirely satisfied with my progress in this journey, the meditation on the future has caused me to carefully examine all facets of my current life & what I believe to be God's vision for the future.

I posit that there is a greater follower of Christ, husband, father, and pastor in my future. The faithful and obedient work that lies in front of me can be daunting, but I have full confidence in God's refining process. I pray for the focused discipline to continually work towards that future and eagerly look forward to the progress along the journey.

My Better Half

I could blog today about all the details of life with my incredible wife. I could write of how we can finish each other's sentences, how her hand fits so perfectly in mine, and how she understands me like no one else does. I could write about the joy I find in making her happy, how I love to watch her walk into and out of a room, or her passion for God, our children and me. I could blog about how she has seen me at my best and my worst and loves me anyway. Details could pour forth on the journey of our marriage and how God has certainly been at work through it all-in the rock bottom times and the highest joys. I could regale you with stories of her character and her passionate desire for what is right even when it is difficult. My blog about her compassion for hurting people, both near & far, would speak to the depth of her heart.

Instead I will simply say that today we celebrate 17 years of marriage and I recognize that I am blessed far beyond what I deserve. When God has gifted you with a companion for life there is nothing sweeter than growing old together through that journey. Wherever life may lead us, I take confidence in knowing that my bride goes with me.

You have my heart and my love as long as I have breath to give it.

Get In the Ring

The body will naturally do one of two things when confronted with stress: fight or flight. There are no other options. When confronted with a situation that causes anxiety we either use the natural rush of adrenaline to stand firm or to find a reason to quickly escape. I saw it in athletes for many years and it resulted in championships for those that refused to run and disappointment for those that didn't recognize that their bodies & emotions had betrayed them. I saw it happen many times in youth ministry as God's truth become evident to young people who either fought the good fight of faith or simply disappeared to never return.

I am pondering this natural, God-created response as I think about the people that I know need to make a decision to follow Christ. There are so many that are sitting in church (not just Northridge either) and are being exposed to the beauty of choosing God's way and yet they don't choose to follow. I sense the Holy Spirit bringing people right to the edge of radical change and then see them run. Fighting isn't easy (it's not called the "nap or flight" reaction) but it reveals our confidence in God's power over our circumstances. It's a trade-off that we are not always consciously making. Do we run from the challenge of life change or stand firm on the promises of God to give us a life that is abundantly full? It's a decision that we must continue to make daily if we want to stay on the narrow path that leads to salvation.

Still Good

It has been a full week. That sentence alone carries more weight than six words should.

I sit here at the end of it and have a hard time fathoming all that has been packed into seven days. I have experienced the joy of seeing others blessed through Christmas gifts and Christmas dinner. I have witnessed warmth as senior citizens came together for a celebration of Christmas through songs and a meal. I have laughed and cried with staff members as we tirelessly work to fulfill God's calling on us and struggle to deal with the trials of our personal lives. I have been overwhelmed by the beauty of the birth of Christ through our Live Nativity and touched by the tears of a father who stopped to thank me for giving his family an opportunity to witness it. I have officiated a wedding, calmed nerves, and asked for God's blessing over a young couple just starting their life together. My heart has been heavy with sorrow over the death of a young man that left us far too early and my tears flowed as I missed grieving with friends. I have prayed and meditated over sharing a message from God to our church and been blessed as God allowed me to preach it.

I am overwhelmed with so many emotions as I look back on this week and I do not know what the week ahead holds for me. I do know that God is still King and that He is still good. No matter what lies ahead those facts will not change. There is great comfort and encouragement in knowing that I worship a God who does not change based on my circumstances.

Too Soon

I experienced one of the coolest athletic feats at a CIY Move conference several years ago. We had a team in the annual dodgeball tournament and were actually playing pretty well. We had moved through the first few rounds and were playing against the worship band. Five of the six members of our team got knocked out very quickly and it looked like our run was over. What happened next was incredible to watch and is a story that I have shared with many people since.

Our one remaining team member was a young man named Trent Turner. Trent was a natural athlete with an incredible arm. He realized how the odds were stacked against him and seemed to take his intensity up a notch (as if it could be any higher for him.) He started methodically mowing down the opposite team by catching everything they threw at him and then knocking them off one at a time. He was throwing so hard that the ball bounced off of their chests as they tried to catch it. When he knocked out a few of them and we realized that he had a shot at pulling this off our cheers grew louder. The crowd surrounding the court started to grow as people came running over to witness this great comeback. When Trent knocked out the last opposing team member we rushed the court with shouts of victory and picked him up to carry him around. It was like we had won the World Series or the Super Bowl.

Trent passed away this week in a car accident-another life taken from us far too soon and my heart is heavy for my own grief and for that of his family & friends. I think back to that day of dodgeball and see how it encapsulates my thoughts of Trent. He lived life with passion and intensity. He drew people to him-we all loved him and his infectious personality and laughter. He would fight for those he loved and for those who couldn't fight for themselves. When he was fired up about a project or goal there was no stopping him from getting it done. All of us wanted to see him succeed and to cheer him on when he did. He lived life at full throttle and I treasure the times of laughter, tears, sweat, worship, and service that we shared together.

You will be missed my friend. I am grateful for the gift that you were to the lives around you.

Comparison Shopping

When we make an inexpensive, impulse buy at a store we make a quick judgment in our mind that it isn't a big deal because the item was cheap and easy to purchase. If we were going to buy a flat screen TV however, we would probably search for the best possible deal, make sure that it had all of the features that we need, and even then may choose not to purchase it. We are putting into practice the principle of assigning value.

At some point in our lives we put a value on spiritual things. We will have to determine whether we want to stay in a small comfort zone or step into the wild journey of following Christ. A decision will have to made about our lifestyle and maintaining it as it is, or whether we will exchange it for God's way of life. We will have to choose either the pleasures of God's Kingdom or the pleasures of sin.

We make these decisions as we determine the cost of declaring allegiance to the King. It is a continual, daily process of assigning value that requires us to actively choose who we will follow.