Still Processing

This past week, my family was part of a team serving in Arizona on the Apache reservation. This is a family tradition of serving that my wife and I have passed down to our daughters and hope has become part of their spiritual DNA. Each trip carries its own challenges and rewards and this week was no different. We had to overcome physical obstacles including tiredness, high elevation, and illness while also juggling the inherent challenges of sharing a small living space with 17 people for a week.

I can look back over our trip with fondness, but I still haven't completely thought through all we experienced. Each trip is packed with so many emotions and memories and it takes some time to meditate carefully on what has happened and what I want to take away from it. This is a process I want to walk through slowly while trying to understand more clearly what we experienced and how I want to use that to help me grow. I don't know yet how all of this meditation will play out, but I feel it's an important personal part of the journey we take through life. To make sure we don't miss out on a vital portion of the trip, we need to carve out time to meditate on our experiences and cling to the pieces we don't want to forget.

Finding Keepsakes

Many people will go on a vacation and take an empty suitcase or bag with them to hold their souvenirs. This way they have plenty of space for the things they want to bring home as part of the memory of their experience.

I encourage our mission teams to do the same thing from a mental and spiritual perspective. We come into these trips with varying expectations and levels of experience. Even though we travel together and see many of the same things, we also perceive those events very differently. Practicing the meditative thought of carrying an empty duffel bag with us gives each person the freedom to pack the piece of our shared memories they wish to keep. It can be the first sight of life on the reservation, a sweet interaction with a child, an opportunity to pray over someone, or even just a new glimpse of a piece of creation.

I can't determine what each person will pack in their bag of keepsakes. I can only encourage them to hang onto a part that has had genuine impact and to let it be a reminder of a special experience when we return to the normal pace of life.

Indirect Benefit

Life is filled with potentially powerful opportunities if we take advantage of them. Short-term mission trips are one of those unique moments. The entire process of putting a group together is a tremendous process. Each team has been a combination of diverse personalities with interesting stories of how they chose to go on the trip. The preparation and fundraising phase is always gratifying as we see needs met and an outpouring of generosity. On the mission field, the collective efforts of a team are fairly amazing to observe as projects come together and people are ministered to. 

The greatest moment on the mission trip might be somewhat selfish in its focus, however. I've found the longest lasting impact is in what I discover about myself. Choosing to serve others provides a mirror in which we see ourselves more clearly. Consciously putting mental and physical efforts into thinking about the needs of others removes barriers of selfishness that normally prevent us from recognizing certain truths about who we are. In the vulnerability of working to help people, we open up our souls to truths that help us grow and show the possibility of who we could become. 

Working Together

It's time for our mission team to head west to Arizona on our yearly adventure. As always, it's a blend of new and veteran team members which always provides a unique experience. There are some things which are the same each year, but there are always new experiences which add to the memories we make together. These short-term mission trips give us an incredible opportunity to grow closer together while serving others. There is power in a group of like-minded people who have sacrificed personal finances, time, energy, and pride to willingly focus on making a difference.

I place great value on these annual trips and can see how they have all had an impact on my family's life. While it reminds me of the potential benefit when we choose to serve others, it also heightens the need for us to have this mindset in our own community. There is something special about traveling to a different culture, but there can also be great power if we adopt the attitude of a compassionate missionary in our own hometown.

Worth Much More Than 1000 (Part 2)

In yesterday's blog I posted a picture (the one above) and left the interpretation up to each individual reader with a promise to reveal more details today. There are specifics which can't be determined without some background information and even then there are observations which vary from person to person. I think it validates the idea of the power of our own perception.

I took this picture several years ago on one of our mission trips to Arizona. This particular photo is on the White Mountain Apache Reservation at a mission we partner with called Apache Youth Ministries (AYM). They have a facility named "The Kennel" which is used to minister to youth in the Apache tribe after schools and provide assistance. They work to develop leadership skills, help with academics, show them new paths of hope, and lead them closer to Christ.

This fence surrounds their building and whether it serves to help keep people in or out depends on how you view it. I think it serves as a line of demarcation that lets the Apache youth know this is a safe place to let down their guard without fear of ridicule or abuse. You can view the reservation through the fence because we don't want to shut out the world around them, but want to help them learn to live in it in a healthy, God-honoring way. The focus on the fence is crisp in contrast to the background. Sometimes it is difficult for these youth (and the faithful people that serve them) to stay zoned in on what matters most. They have entered in through this gate and will soon leave and step back into the reality of their personal world.

This picture is worth so much more than 1000 words to me because I know the underlying story and the people it represents. I see great potential, devastating disappointment, and life-giving joy all contained in this one simple photo. Keeping things like this in front of us can remind us of the moments we contribute to.

If you are interested in contributing to mission work with the Apache in Arizona, you can contact AYM directly at www.apacheyouth.com or contribute to our next mission trip through PayPal and my email address acportwood@gmail.com.

Good and Tired

I am very tired this week and I know our mission team from last week shares in that feeling. It's always an adjustment to return to life at home after a week of life on a mission trip. The time zone difference (three hours from Arizona to Georgia) is always difficult to overcome on top of the exhaustion from the trip itself. The impact of the mission field is still heavy on all of our minds and hearts as we unpack our experiences as well. It's a good sense of tired from what we have accomplished and also a spiritual weariness from having exerted so much energy in striving to have a positive impact. There is a certain speed to things on mission trips that keeps you moving beyond the point of exhaustion and fuels you for more than you think you are capable of.

Coming home brings all of this to a halt and you suddenly realize exactly how tired you are. Nerves that were constantly on alert have depleted energy stores and leave you feeling like butter spread over too much bread.* You yearn for the togetherness of the team and the focused energy of your mission and yet relish the comforts of home and the chance to let down your guard. Being home requires a recalibration of body and soul as we return to a more familiar pace of life. The immediate goal is rest and recovery and then to make sure the lessons from the trip are firmly implanted as we move forward.

Split In Two

I have just returned from my 12th year of leading mission trips to the Apache reservation in Arizona (18 total trips over those years) and still miss it. There is always a difficulty in readjusting to the regular pace of life. My heart is always so full after a week of unique experiences, bonding with teammates, seeing victories up close, and feeling heartache over cultural circumstances. It's not something that can be set behind you quickly or relegated to memory without some time to consider the full impact of the trip. Arizona and the wonderful people there are a part of my family and I always greatly anticipate the next time I get to return.

My passion for Arizona does not soften my passion for Milledgeville however. God gently reminds me of the call to be part of sharing the Gospel here in our community as well. In fact, many times in Arizona our team would recognize the parallels between what we saw out west and our own town back east. We were all in agreement that our mission with our Apache friends & missionaries was powerful, but that our greatest call was to infect our home with the same passionate enthusiasm. There is a sense of urgency to reach people as we recognize that our mission field is all around us.

I am firmly rooted here and excited about the challenges God has in front of us to reach our community. I don't think that it's a bad thing that part of my heart is also in small neighborhoods, after school programs, missions, and a beautifully dark reservation either. It helps keep me focused spiritually and physically.

Contrary to popular belief, it is possible to be in two places at once.

Big Things, Small Package

Small objects may not seem like much to some people, but that is usually because they don't understand what they represent. The necklace pictured above probably is only slightly interesting or relevant to an outside observer. To the one that it has been given, however, it represents so much more. 

I received this last week on the reservation from a young lady we spent a couple of days with. She quietly gave it to me as a token of her appreciation for a few days with our team. It was handcrafted and symbolizes the hope she is seeking and the brief light we were able to shine in her life as she struggles with so much darkness. It reflects the happiness we shared with her during our visit--a happiness she said she hadn't felt in several months. It is a gift shyly and generously given out of the overflow of a heart that felt loved and valued by every one of our team. 

This is a present that I will not soon forget. Even though it is small, it is packed with more meaning than can accurately be described.

Returning Home

We casually pass through most weeks of our life and often don't meditate deeply on what happened. We have our routines and normal activities and continue to move along as the calendar flows from one month to the next. Every now and then we will experience something that makes a week stand out from the rest. These are the weeks that stick out in our memory and cause us to reflect on them more deeply after they have passed.

I have been fortunate to share that unique week for the last seven days with 16 special people. We have worked, played, laughed, and sung songs for hours together while serving in Arizona on the mission field. We lived quite peacefully in a bunkhouse and worked to encourage each other while maintaining flexibility. We come from different church backgrounds and life experiences and were forged together under the common goal of serving on the Apache reservation. The friendships forged here may taper in intensity as time passes, but they will always represent a week that bears remembering and carries more meaning as we reflect on it's power.

Beautiful Things

Arizona is one of the most beautiful places I have ever been. The reservation is surrounded by God-carved canyons, sweeping plains, and thick groups of trees. I never get tired of the view and love to share it with new team members each year as we travel out. It's an almost overwhelming beauty with the brightness of the skies and the lushness of the landscape.

The rich wonder of the land is painfully paired with the depth of despair in so many of the people. It's almost impossible to reconcile the idea of God-crafted nature and human brokenness. Together they create a discordant symphony of desperate need. While being painful to observe, I can at least gain some comfort from God's promises to create wonderful things out of our dysfunction. The gorgeous world we can see is a reflection of God's power to bring restoration when it seems too far gone.  

Mission Team

Each mission team is unique and wonderful in their own way. They are created by a complex recipe of personalities, stages of faith, life maturity, and timing. These combinations can't ever be duplicated even if the same people are involved. This is part of what makes the trip special and creates a lasting bond that is rarely broken. I am grateful for each group of people I have been honored to be part of and hope that those teams look back on our shared experiences just as fondly.

A Glimpse

Mission work on the reservation is not always easy. I have tremendous respect for our full-time missionary friends who have committed their lives to serving here for more than the week we are able to give. We see small sample sizes of the difficulties they face each day, but can't completely recognize the depth of their emotions.

They continue to pray and reach out to young people and families in hopes of sharing Christ and changing futures, but often see more disappointments than successes. The weight of hopelessness and despair increases with each child that wanders away. I know from talking to several of them that they often wonder how effective they are. Thankfully, God gives glimpses of hope that remind them that they are having an impact.

We talked with a beautiful young woman today that is focused on God and His plan for her. Her path is not easy and she will continue to have many difficulties to overcome. She is resolutely intent on rising above her circumstances and even her culture to make a difference. She knows her identity in Christ and wants to follow His path. She isn't abandoning her people either, but wants to come back and be part of the solution.

This is a powerful testimony to what happens when a life is transformed when surrounded by darkness. It's the glimpse of hope that is needed to keep working to make a difference.

The Reason

We come out to Arizona for a lot of different reasons, but sometimes a simple picture of two very happy girls is reason enough for today.

Heading West

After months of preparation, prayer, and sacrifice, our mission team is in Arizona today. We've traveled across the country (most of us) to meet in Show Low and begin a week of dedicated mission work. This is my 12th year of leading trips and I can attest to the fact that every trip is unique. I'm excited to see what is going to happen with this group and how we will form a great team through working together. There's nothing quite like the bonds that are formed through selflessly serving others. 

Don't Rush It

My family (and the rest of our mission team) will be in Arizona a week from now. We've been planning this trip for months and will soon find ourselves out west once again. There is a palpable energy of anticipation among the team as all our preparation becomes reality very soon. It's an exciting time to look forward to and while I want to get there quickly, I also don't want the experience to be over too soon. 

It's a regular part of human nature to want time to speed up to get us to the exciting things and then for it to slow down once we arrive there. Sadly, that isn't the way it works. Instead, we've got to be patient in the preparation and planning and enjoy the moments as long as they last. Hurrying through parts of our life will cause us to miss something important. Even if we repeat an event (like a yearly mission trip) each year is unique enough to merit its own special attention.

Forging Community

Our Arizona mission team worked together this morning to pull off our annual "Winner Winner BBQ Dinner" fund raiser. It was a success on many fronts including the tremendous generosity of people at Northridge, servant-minded volunteers, and the leadership of my wife.

These events are powerful as they give us a chance to bond as a team with a common objective in mind. When you are going to work together in a foreign culture it's essential to have a training ground to build unity. It's similar to a preseason workout that prepares us for the real work ahead of us. This practice run gets us familiar with each other while we build some sweat equity. It won't effectively prepare us for everything we will face, but it does help to know that we have each other's back when it counts.

Arizona Missions

 The Apache reservation in Arizona has been an important part of my life since 2004 when I led my first mission trip to Show Low. Since then I have been part of 15 different teams and will now have my entire family out there this spring. It's a life changing event for each team that goes out west and we still share stories of what happened.

The best benefit is in the lives that we get to impact while there. I believe in the power of short term mission trips especially when you make a consistent effort in one area. The relationships we have built with the long term missionaries is an encouragement to them as they work faithfully each day in a tough area. We are also able to see the benefits of building trust with the Apache people as we 

continue to make an investment.

I'm excited about the group we have assembled this year and know that the total experience will have elements of newness mixed in with our familiarity with the area. Now comes the hard work of preparing for us to go.

My wife & I have prepared for years by asking for a simple donation of $5. We have been able to take care of our trips (even with expanding family members) each year through this simple plea. Anyone who would like to help with a $5 donation can do so through Paypal by clicking the link below. Thanks in advance for any help you can give as we prepare to head west.

Donate through Paypal using email address: acportwood@gmail.com

Built to Last

We have the potential to experience special spiritual moments that challenge and touch us more deeply than others. It could be a mission trip that changes our perspective, a week at camp that shows us new things about ourselves, or a week at CIY Move that exposes us to new direction for our lives. These become markers of maturity that we look back on with great fondness and that hopefully spur us on to something new and fresh in our faith. The great challenge is always in maintaining the intensity that we find in these moments.

It's obviously not possible to stay at the exact same level that we experience in these big events and in fact, we wouldn't want to. Being exposed to varying degrees of intensity makes each moment special and reminds us of the journey that we are on towards maturity. Each experience then becomes a catalyst that propels us forward toward God and teaches us something new as it becomes part of our faith history. Our hope is to take these occasions and add to them so that we maintain a steady commitment to a life that honors God. It's not a matter of relying entirely on these special times for impact, but combining them with our daily faith and watching God work in us all year long.

That is something that will last.

Making Sense

Working in the mission field is not always glamorous. There are times when you feel you are making a huge impact and there are times you are cleaning toilets. Both of them are important in their own way even if one leaves you feeling more fulfilled than the other.

We were working together on a project on this last trip cleaning two large swamp coolers. They were covered in tar and grime and needed to be scraped clean and then repainted. It was fairly tedious work and we spent two days trying to get them ready to paint. The first day we worked at it was a bit monotonous as it took a long time to prep. Honestly, our biggest obstacle was our motivation.

Our original (mistaken) thought was that we were doing this so they could be put back in storage for some future potential use. After asking a few questions I discovered that they had been removed from the kitchen roof and were going to be put back up there for summer use. Once we understood what they were going to be used for, it changed our motivation and we didn't seem to mind the work as much.

When we understand the purpose behind what we are doing it changes our level of energy. We now have a connection between our task and a goal that makes sense. When we understand what the purpose is for something we tend to work harder at it and find more joy in the process. Connecting the dots to see the bigger picture is a key part of fulfillment and our personal motivation.

Reflections: Pray Anyway

One of the most unexpectedly powerful moments from our trip to Arizona happened on the last day. We were working with Apache Youth Ministries and going out to spots on the reservation for prayer. Our first location was a local liquor store that was stuck off a side road. The place looked pitiful as we pulled up. It was a tacky, old building sitting in the middle of beautiful scenery. We got out of our van and talked about the power of alcoholism on the reservation. Just as we were about to pray a man started walking over to our group and motioned for me to come closer. When I approached him I could immediately tell that he hadn't been sober in a long time. His state of inebriation was deeply embedded in him and yet he was asking for prayer. I listened to him for several minutes as the rest of our group gathered around us. We all ended up laying hands on him, praying for him and his companion, and inviting them to the local church. He thanked us all with hugs and handshakes and then proceeded into the liquor store to make his purchase.

I wasn't surprised that he continued to his intended destination. I don't doubt the power of prayer, but I do understand the strong grip of habits and addiction. Our group could have ignored him or brushed off his request, but our responsibility is to be faithful when the opportunity arises. We can't guarantee success or even the authenticity of his desire. We simply choose whether we will do what is right.