Escapism

Two days a week I have coffee with a friend as our local Starbucks opens. We give up a little sleep and morning quiet time to connect with each other and share thoughts on any number of things. As I sat down this morning with my coffee, I was waiting for my friend to get his from the counter. Since I was sitting alone at the table, I started to reach for my phone so I could scroll through social media and email while I waited. I stopped myself before I could pull my phone out as I realized I was only looking to kill two minutes before he sat down. That’s right—it was a two minute wait I had to endure and I was looking for a way to escape sitting still.

Technology can be an incredibly useful tool, but it has also become our most common method of escapism. We avoid the people around us in public places by staring at our phones, ignore our families by scrolling through social media, and neglect the moments of potential quiet thought while waiting for the rest of our life to keep moving. It’s not just a fascination with the world around us, but it has become a way for us to practice escapism. We can focus on the details of everything except for the simple realism of the moment right in front of us.

Common Ground(s)

It's fairly obvious to anyone that knows me that I enjoy a good cup of coffee. Hopefully they realize this from the coffee pot and grinder in my office and not from coffee breath (I use mints for that.) I find something soothing in a good cup of java and enjoy a couple of cups each morning and often in the afternoon as well. I find that it helps to put people at ease and creates an easy opportunity to talk.

I don't aim to overvalue what can happen when people are sharing this delightful hot beverage. I do know it tends to put people at ease while providing a social encounter without great pressure. We are able to sit together over this brewed nectar and have a respectful, give-and-take conversation. I don't believe it's magical (maybe a little), but it brings us together on common ground around something we can agree on. That's the first step in sharing honestly with each other and working out the other issues we might share. I've seen it work too many times to discount it.

Perhaps we should start more potentially divisive dialogues over coffee.

Coffee Time

Those who know me can attest to my love for a cup of coffee. I will have 2-3 cups each morning and follow that up with an afternoon cup or two as well. I like a strong brew and drink it black. I enjoy going to a local coffee shop and having a cup, but enjoy it even more when the company is good. It's the conversations and life-to-life interaction that is a true passion of mine.

Today I was blessed to spend that coffee time with my youngest daughter, Olivia. This is actually something we started in Florida where we take each of our lovelies out for individual coffee time. It gives us the opportunity to invest in each of them and revel in the closeness we can share over a beverage. As they get older I am more intentional about our conversations and try to share more with them than just the day-to-day of life. My hope is that we can build a bridge of safe communication and give them a chance to share what they are thinking. I never take this time for granted, but pray that they enjoy it as much as I do and can look back on it as something special done together  

                                                             and as a fundamental part of their growth.

I can't see the end results of this time we share, but I am trusting that this loving mentoring will help them as they grow older. I only have so much time with them in this phase of life and I don't want to waste a moment we have together.