Trying to Move On

Has someone ever done something to you that you struggled to forgive them for? I don't think any of us hasn't battled with offering forgiveness at some point. The most difficult forgiveness isn't always offered to others though, but can be what we deny ourselves. In his book, Moving Forward, Everett Worthington shares the intimate details of his own struggle following his brother's suicide. Early in the book he shares this simple truth, "The struggle is with yourself, and much of the work that needs to be done is in understanding your self, the circumstances of your biggest regrets, and the effect of these issues on your daily life."

Everett's painful personal story form the backdrop to this helpful book as he is starkly honest about his struggles with self-forgiveness. It's only in his own recovery that he is able to share true statements that help others overcome the pattern of self-condemnation. He says, " Breaking free from self-condemnation requires first that you become aware of the problem--and once you're aware of it, decide to deal with it." It's an honest and direct approach to an overwhelming problem. His main teaching and therapy principle is based on REACH forgiveness which carries you through five steps: Recall the hurt, Emotional replacement, Altruistic gift of forgiveness, Commit to the forgiveness you experience, Hold on to the forgiveness whenever you doubt you have forgiven. While it may appear to be formulaic it is more practical in terms of psychological and spiritual healing. 

It was difficult to read parts of this book and not because of the poor content. Everett's story of personal struggle with his brother's suicide painted a very real picture of someone who struggled through the very things that he was teaching. This is not an author spouting off theory, but one who had waded through the real battles of practical application. His intimate connection with God enabled him to find real healing and that is the premise of any genuine recovery from this kind of devastation. I recommend slowly reading through his book if this is a personal area of hardship. Meditating on each chapter will give the reader an opportunity to reflect on personal contributions to emotional struggles and find restoration through God's ultimate healing.

I received this book for free from WaterBrook Multnomah Publishing Group for this review.

Work & Wait

What do we do when we are:

Confused?
Uncertain?
Conflicted?
Broken?
Discouraged?
Depressed?
Weary?


The only way to make it through is to keep doing what you know is right. Trust in what God has done in the past and believe in His promise to never abandon His children. He will make things known & clear in His timing. We can't change the time frame, but we can keep placing our confidence in His coming answers to our prayers.

Coincidental God

I don't believe in coincidence. I know that sometimes it might seem as if things just happen to flow together at the right time, but I give more credence to God than I do to chance. This confident belief takes interesting circumstances and attributes them to the grand design of a sovereign King instead of trusting in happenstance. It doesn't take away from the "cool factor" of the occurrence, but it does help me pay careful attention when it happens.

If I hold fast to the presumption of God's design over coincidence then I have to observe each instance with respect and anticipation. Being in the right place to have a conversation with someone in need is no longer "lucky", but a choice I have to be obedient to where God is leading me. It's a grand adventure with unlimited potential for connecting, influencing, and bringing hope to people surrounding me. When I recognize that it's not my own deft orchestrations or personal power bringing success I can see where God is setting things up for the greatest impact.

Making Time

What are you making time for in your life? When you make certain decisions (to get married, have a family, accept a job, volunteer, follow Christ) there are responsibilities that along with those choices. With our limited resources of time and energy, we will only be able to invest in certain things. While choosing to act responsibly will limit the expendable time we have left, it is still ours to spend. The question all of us face is what we will do in those moments.

• Do we increase the depth of our current relationships? 
• Are we reading & learning as a leader? 
• Are we wasting time in efforts that bring no return results? 
• Are we finding pleasure in a hobby that keeps getting squeezed out of our daily schedule? 
• Do we volunteer and give part of that time back to others with no expectations in return?
• Are we finding time to rest and recover from the other parts of our week?
• Do we consistently make time for exercise?
• When are we devoting ourselves to our journey with God?

We will make time for the things that are important to us. Once we figure out what that is we might have to move our schedules around to make time for it all. We either go through the rescheduling or end up lamenting the lack of time we have for important things.

I Need Thee

I stumbled across an adaptation of an old hymn last week that has been resonating in my head since I found it. That might be influenced by the fact that I've listened to it at least 20 times this past week. It's an incredibly beautiful & creative acoustic version of the hymn, "I Need Thee Every Hour" with one man (Sam Robson) singing nine different parts. The harmonies are gorgeous and I certainly marvel at Sam's range and ability to work this together. It's not just the musical groove that draws me in however. It's the simplicity of understanding my deep need for God in every hour of my life. I don't want to only desire Him in tough situations or circumstances, but in times of peace and confidence as well. He is my King, my Heavenly Father, and the Lover of My Soul and I desperately need Him at all times. It's not just an acknowledgement, but an impassioned plea.

Just One

This journey of life is often difficult. There are circumstances and events surrounding us that are often outside of our control. Our relationships go through rough patches with some of them becoming permanently severed in the process. Our minds work overtime as we try to make sense out of insensible facts and the decisions of others. We even fret over the outcome of the future even though we can barely make sense of today's happenings. Sometimes we will manage to push through these storms and be at peace. There are other times when it all seems to collapse at the same time and we become completely undone.

There is no magic button to have it all make sense or for everything to become instantly better. We simply have to remind ourselves that while we may not have seen this confluence of events God is not surprised or caught off guard. We recognize that we cannot manipulate all of life's events to work out for our own good and put our faith in a Father and King who is able to control what we cannot. We take a deep breath (sometimes through tears and often in frustration) and simply ask God for the strength and focus we need for this day.

We can't travel a journey of 1000 miles all at once and we won't arrive at a secure, confident future in a blink of an eye either. We trust God for what He brings to us today and seek nothing more. When we can pray this in confidence we'll find that God is giving us exactly what we need to persevere for this one 24 hour period. We'll then see that the difficult journey becomes more manageable when we only ask God to give us what we need to be strong today.

Keep Moving

I hate being interrupted when I'm talking to someone. I also hate it when my momentum is interrupted as well. I often feel as if I have a decent rhythm, but if I take my eyes off what is important I can quickly find myself off track. Constant reminders, task lists, and repeating the vision helps me stay focused on the right path. I have to speak the truth of a preferred future often or the malaise of an ordinary present reality takes over.